i cried. in public. i cried while walking. nothing was on my mind at tt time. all i knew was that i m crying, and how wonderful it'd be if i was home, snuggled under my comforter, and in my comfort zone. i'm up and abt since morning on a wrong day. too wrong a day.

maybe the reason y i cried was cox i was bugged by some hantu arnd. or maybe, it was just the frustration i felt at tt moment, and the fatigue finally getting to me. i'm in mid-sem. having mid-sem break. which basically means i'm lagging by half a sem. normally, when i'm lagging behind in work, i'm not tired physically. i used to have a good time resting (ie not doing anything) AND still be in sync in sch. now, i'm tired cox i lack slp and my brain is not working. i zone out for every single min. i really need rest. a day when i dun need to rush for time.

i don't like how i was dumped in nowhere just for your convenience. do i really mean so little to you? even tho i pushed back everything for you?

i know tt i'm seen as a cocky bitch.
to those who r fine with me being that: you shld have seen me at the moment when i was lost, sobbing n stripped of my confident facade. you wouldn't know me.
to those who totally detest me for being tt: you would have savoured tt moment. the moment when a cocky bitch realises that she has not done anything worthy in this life and that she has absolutely nothing to be cocky or bitchy abt.

to lump. i hope i didn't freak you out too much by calling you n crying. i just tot of u at tt moment.

to izzy. thank you v much. u'r one of the few reasons y i miss mjc. at least i know my moments in mjc weren't really ALL useless.

to beat. i love you too. u brought a smile back.

to my dad. not that he'll see this, but i've to say this. he's THE only person in this world who will actually stop all tt he's doing just to get back home frm town even tho he was busy n far frm town. he's THE only person in this world who will throw everything away just because i cried. he's THE only person i know who will sacrifice everything for me. (otherthanmymom)

all those who actually bothered to read thru everything, in all appreciation n love, here's a pic of my dad n mom. not the most flattering, but its d only one in my lappy. he's the one who gave me tt genes, making me short, fat and ugly. and because he gave me tt genes, his love for me is unconditional. and all i return are demands for money, cries for help and frequent displays of unhappiness. he's my old man. he's the man.

my eyes hurt frm crying. but i can't stop my tears.