hear my calls to help me stay buoyant?

the waves don't happen to have mercy.

they sweep everything away, and allow no shred of hope for an escape.

they keep you under, and diminish all traces of oxygen.

they smother.

i wonder how long the smile will remain.



and right now, all i want to do, is to hear the waves crashing upon the shore.

and i can pretend that i'm above the waves.

safe.

when, in actual fact, i happen to be slipping under.


i was told that most of my entries happen to be negative.

not that it surprises me.

i can share happy stuff easily.

but when some haunting issues that can't be spoken loom about

who will keep me buoyant?



i know i sound suicidal.

im not. no worries.

not yet, at least.